The new house!

I thought it was prudent to mention why it's been so silent...  I mentioned it over a month ago, but we finally, finally, finally closed on our house!  We are homeowners.  With a house that needs a new roof and the floors done.  Among other things!  Yikes.  This expensive but super exciting adventure has been taking up 90% of my free time lately!

On the wedding front, it's been slow.  The current thought for colors is Gray, Navy Blue, with accents of Pink and Green.  I think it sounds fun.  We are considering having the boys on his side wear gray suits with green ties, then the guy on my side with a gray suit and a pink tie, and my MOH in a pink dress (or would a gray dress with a pink sash fit better?).  We've already changed our minds over a million times, so...  Who knows what we'll end up with, though.

I've also been doing research.  Lots and lots of research.  Who knew there were SO MANY photographers in the area?  I have a spreadsheet a mile long of photographers alone, and those are just the ones whose styles I liked.  I need to sit Dino down to review some of them with me, just to get an idea of what he likes as well.

And then there are the caterers.  I kind of have my heart set on one in particular, but I'm not sure how full service they are.  We'll need them to do a lot of set-up and stuff, since I don't want to subject my family and friends to that on the day.  And I don't want to do it either.  I haven't really found tons of caterers yet, though, probably because I've been filtering through so many photographers!

It is actually kind of nice to have two major things to plan and think about.  When I get tired of searching photographers, I can always go to pinterest for home design ideas (specifically wood floor stain colors at this moment...).  Then when that gets tiring, pinterest has tons of wedding inspiration as well!  Fabulous!

I must be so boring in real life, all I talk about is the house or the wedding!

Career vs. Relationship

This isn't exactly wedding related, but it's something I've been thinking about...

My life lately has been a dichotomy.  One half is WONDERFUL!  Completely satisfied!  Happy as a clam!  The other half is depressed, downtrodden, and desperate. 

When I graduated college, I landed a sweet gig, working in my mom’s office, doing something I was fully capable of.  Excellent.  Then I decided I wanted a partner in life, a man to share my life with.  So online I went, and presto!  Not 3 months later I had found an amazing guy!  So I started pouring more and more time into our relationship, and no longer was as invested in my job because I suddenly had a life.   I moved slightly closer to my man, and things were looking good.

Jump forward two years, and I had HAD it.  First off I lived over a half hour away from my love.  Can you imagine?  (I’m being sarcastic now, but it sure felt like the world was ending then!)  Plus I just couldn’t take my job anymore.  It was mind-numbing.  Soul-crushing.  I hadn’t intended to be at that job forever, and my time was up.  My company and I decided together that I was ready to move on, and they gave me 2 months to figure out my next move.  I thought “hey, I can get a new job, one closer to my boyfriend!” but neglected to line up a new job prior to quitting.  On the VERY LAST DAY of my employment, I got an offer for a job.  A part time, boring, low level job.  I took it!

With the new job meant I needed to find a new place to live.  Although we had discussed never, ever moving in together before engagement, suddenly I had a job that was 15 minutes from his place, and over an hour from my parents’ (I gave up my expensive apartment in the midst of job quitting.  When changing one thing, I like to change everything).  So I was going to spend work nights at his place, and other nights at my parents’.  But then, as tends to happen, I decided I liked being around him more.  So I just kind of stayed.  And stayed.  And soon enough, I was living there too.  Which was fine. 

My new job turned out to be a nice change... for awhile.  I loved working part time, but hated the pay.  I got the chance to move to full time, and did, but it meant taking on more small tasks.  It too became mind-numbing and soul-crushing.  I realized I still had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up, just that I wanted to be with my boyfriend. 

After college I managed to get a couple okay jobs (yes, I realize I am super lucky to have had solid employment since graduation, but it doesn’t mean they are good jobs), while focusing most of my time on my relationship and love.  I forgot to get a career of any sort. 

I wish there was a happy ending to this, but I’m still in the thick of it.  On the wonderful side, my man proposed to me almost exactly a year after I snuck/moved in to his place!  On the depressing side, I still don’t like my job and I still don’t know where to go with my career.  One half of my life is pretty much smooth sailing and all figured out!  The other half is floundering around helplessly, making grand plans that soon get smooshed by practicality and indecision.  I am so grateful for my relationship, but find myself hoping we can get married and have kids already so I’ll have a good excuse to stop working my dead-end job!  But life doesn’t work that way, I’ve found.